A Land Called Foolish Pride
Another week and another day this photo comes to define this year. I originally published these photos as part of my photomixtape “I’m Locked Inside A Land Called Foolish Pride” about a month ago, the photos in it are even older. These images were made at the height of the protest, around the beginning of June, which feels like 100 years ago at this point. As someone with very little hope for this iteration of our country, it feels like there will be stories like the past week until the day I die. That doesn’t mean I won’t applaud, assist, and struggle with the people fighting everyday to make sure that isn’t the case, but it does mean I will always have a healthy dose of skepticism. But this post isn’t about our larger struggle, its about these photos and how I think still being an amateur with this photography stuff yielded some impressive results and some of my favorite photos that spoke to me this week especially.
Today I thought I’d do a commentary on the creation of the images in this photo-mixtape collection I’m calling “A Land Called Foolish Pride”. (Forewarning, these photos are basically illegible if your brightness is down so turn it way up for the full experience.)
Technical Specs
I shot this on my Nikon F3, which is a durable and compact professional film camera made in the 90’s. Now, not being anywhere close to a professional I was kind of wielding this beast without the full finesse and insight it deserves. With the camera, I used a 50mm lens and this very peculiar film stock called Ferannia P30 which was originally a black and white negative film used in old Italian movies, adapted for film cameras. The main thing to know about the film is its very contrasty, meaning the whites are very white and the blacks are very black.
Capturing A Crowd
Camera in hand, it was several minutes into the protest before I realized that this had been the first time I had been close, sharing the same space and energy of folks, in months. I think there was something about that collective rule breaking, being right up against one another, that adds a certain electricity to these photos when I look back at them. My camera became an extension of my hands as I reached up, down, and around to get shots of people who were celebrating, folks who were angry, and folks dealing publicly with an anguish few could understand. I’m sure having auto-focus would have made that day a lot easier, but the little effort I had to put into focusing right on people’s faces, on their backs, on their fists, I think added something to the final photos.
Le Results
Because of the film’s sensitive nature and my general inexperience I ended up underexposing all of my images, making the blacks extra inky and the whites blown out. However this amateur mistake ended up being quite the blessing in disguise. I remember when the protests were in full swing there was a conversation on social media about who gets to photograph and share these moments, and more importantly the tactical importance of obscuring activist identities from the state. So before these photos were developed I felt a way about whether or not to publish them. The mistake I made of underexposing addressed this for me. The darkness of the photos lend them a kind of mysterious and stark quality, but they also hide people’s faces. The results become more figurative but I think they still show the feelings people felt that day. My favorite photo is the cover image, not only because the stark black and white really work but also because I think shame is where the white mainstream is stuck at right now. There’s beauty in fully recognizing the state as the inherently violent actor it is, but also a tragedy that people have landed on shame as the answer to its brutality. If we don’t move past shaming and towards real retributive justice we’ll continue to be stuck.
Hope this gave you some insight into my process, and would love to hear thoughts. This is the first post with a comment section, so let me know what you think below. Also listed some recommendations from the past month, enjoy!
Notable Movies Watched in August:
Grand Budapest Hotel (2014) - The colors in this movie are just the pinnacle of colors in a Wes Anderson movie. Also the pinnacle of whip pans.
Luce (2019) - Did the most, to say so little…also, I’m already an Octavia Spencer stan but my hate for the lead character embolden me to the point of fanaticism. (maybe it was a good movie)
Notable Books Read in August:
Gordon Parks The Atmosphere of Crime (1957) - so much talent in one body
What We Lose: Zinzi Clemons (2017) - not as heartbreaking as I expected, but still emotionally stripped to the bone
Notable Albums/Singles Listened to in August:
Fantasy(s.) (2020) by Against All Logic - he flips & whips 2000’s Beyonce…and it works!
Quarantine Cassanova(a.) (2020) by Chromeo - really funny and catchy, perfect time capsule
My Future(s.) (2020) by Billie Eilish - the anime music video put it over the top
Lianna La Havas(a.) (2020) by Lianna La Havas - still think she’s cosplaying as Corrine Bailey Rae but best opening to an album this year
Gold Teeth(s.) (2019) by Blood Orange, Project Pat, Gangsta Boo, and Tinashe - this is exactly what I like to drive to
…
eric
